I’m a Raiders Fan and I Hate the Denver Horses, Pt. 1

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for BroncosZone.com

Published: June 24, 2009

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I ride with the sliver and black, Oakland California, home of the grand daddy, you square-ass fucks, and in the Bay Area, we ain’t on that punk rock sqaure Denver Horse bullshit, you feel me? Over here it’s Town Bizness.

Even though it’s June, it’s never to early to ride on Denver Horse fans.

Let me begin by saying this is directed towards all Denver fans on Bleacher Report. When it comes to Oakland, Denver fans get no love.

 

Offense

Denver fans sit and here and try to explain why they will be better off without Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall, the soon-to-be traded WR.

But you know what? No one gives a fuck. Denver overall is a team for squares, ya’ll logo is a damn orange horse, that’s wack, just like Kyle Orton. Matter fact if I hear Kyle Orton name one more time I think i’m going to puke.

Bring Kyle Orton poodle ass into Oakland, I love the fact that zero, I mean zero Horse fans followed Kyle Orton last season nor the Chicago Bears. The fact that Horse fans didn’t even watch Kyle Orton play every week, but now they act like this guy will have a break out year.

News flash, this isn’t the New England Pats, Randy Moss, Wes Welker, etc aren’t on this team. If and when the Horses lose Brandon Marshall, who will be the No. 1 WR for the Denver Horses? Hmmm…let’s take a look.

Brandon Lloyd, Eddie Royal, Brandon Stokley, and Jabar Gaffney

You guys can’t be serious, without Brandon Marshall all those guys suck, the reason why Eddie Royal and Brandon Stokley are decent is because there able to go against 2nd and 3rd CB’s.

Plus the damn fact that Jay Cutler, a pro bowl QB was throwing the ball, the Broncos threw the football over 600 times last season, all of the WR’s numbers are coming down. Eddie Royal won’t have 90 catches, Stokley won’t have 50.

I still don’t know who you guys are trying to scare with Brandon Lloyd, I’m guessing because he was on the Bears last season? I don’t know, but I guess he will be your No. 1 or 2 WR once Marshall is gone.

Brandon Marshall is the reason why those guys get open. Horse fans are so damn dumb I swear. I hope Brandon Marshall gets traded, he is to good of a player to have to deal with a franchise that is bound to lose in 2009-2010, why else would he DEMAND a trade out of sorry ass Denver. Marshall puts up back to back pro bowl seasons, and yet Denver refuses to give him a 4 year 40 million contract. I really hope he gets to shine on a better team.

Next let’s take a look at the 2009-2010 Denver Horses running backs, drum-roll please, drum-roll please…

Correll Buckhalter, a long time backup who is pure hot garbage, so bad the Eagles dropped him and brought in a rookie to backup Brian Westbrook, I can’t stop laughing, Correll Buckhalter, wow. That’s a game changer…. NOT

Lamont “I haven’t done a damn thing since 2005, and its 2009, I was overrated as a backup to Curtis Martin, I get slower every year was cut from the Raiders because Justin Fargas was better, went to New England but was cut from there, and now my old coach is now the new coach of the Broncos so I think I will play there and suck even worse then I did last season” Jordan

I really don’t know what to say about that, Lamont Jordan on the Denver Horses, that right there is a perfect match up, a sucker playing for a sucker ass team.

And last but not least.

With the 12 overall pick in the 2009 NFL draft the Denver Broncos select Brain Orakpo from Texas…

Wait, wait, wait….

You mean to tell me, the damn horses select Knowshon Moreno, what kind of bullshit ass pick is that? Whatever, Horse fans will defend him to the end, so I guess we’ll just have to wait and see on Moreno.

Corell, Lamont, and Knowshon…YEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH BUDDY!

Ryan Harris sucks.

 

Defense

Ryan McBean, Ronald Fields, Kenny Peterson, Carlton Powell, Marcus Thomas, Darell Reid…

What do these guys all have in common?

They all suck.

This could be the worst D Line unit in the league, a bunch of no namers who are fixing to get ran on like a ripper on the Vegas strip.

Robert Ayers, I mean you guys can’t be serious, Robert Ayers? We have another Jarvis Moss in the making, go back two years ago, and I promise Denver Horse fans was like, Jarvis Moss is the truth, I’m so glad we drafted Jarvis Moss, I’m going to go get me a Jarvis Moss jersey, I wonder if Jarvis Moss is related to Randy Moss, Jarvis Moss is the next Julius Peppers.

Robert Ayers isn’t the answer, ya’ll passed on Orakpo for Moreno, remember that Horse fans.

What do Elvis Dumervil and Alphonso Smith have in common? THEY ARE THE SAME HEIGHT! Both are 5’9″ with shoes on hahaha…

Speaking on Alphonso Smith, Josh Mcdonald, just had to have Smith, he was a can’t miss player I guess, worth a 2010 first-round draft pick? Well since the Horses won’t be making the playoffs, and won’t be doing better then 8-8, that first round pick next season will be worth a lot. Horse fans are going to be wishing for that pick next season…

Alphonso won’t start, Andre Goodman, Josh Bell, and Jack Williams are better then Alphonso, and those 3 players I just listed sucked.

NEWS FLASH, NEWS FLASH, NEWS FLASH… Champ Bailey is getting old, Champ is slowing down, lacks tackles, interceptions, and will be lucky not to get hurt again this season…

Next on the list… DJ Williams… hold on… I can’t speak bad on DJ, as DJ is from the Bay Area, he’s the best player on your defense and hes from the bay area California? hmm… think about it.

Andra Davis a nice pick up, nothing bad to say about him.

Renaldo… no I’m not talking about a Brazilian soccer player, I’m talking about Renaldo Hill, weak ass Renaldo Hill from Miami, he’s garbage.

Brain Dawkins will bring that much needed fear to the Horses secondary…

To bad he’s 6-8 years pass his prime.

His best years are in Philly, if Dawkins was still the player he used to be, then he would still be in Philly. Honestly, I think Denver is the only team in the NFL that wanted a 36 year old safety, oldest safety in the league?

Matt Prater? 25-for-34? 73 percent last season? How do you say garbage in Spanish?

Brett Kem sucks

 

Coaching Staff

Three mikes

Mike McCoy –  looks like a geek, who’s calling the offense McCoy or McDonald

Mike Nolan – how did he do with the 49ers again? I can see it now, Mcdonald yelling at Mike Nolan asking whats going on with the defense, why can’t we stop anyone only to see Nolan just standing there looking puzzled

Mike Priefer- The Horses hire the Chiefs old Spiecal teams coach, wow.

Dan Martindale – The Horses hire the Raiders old linebacker coach, haha this just gets better and better.

Josh McDonald – the man who drove Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall out of town.

 

Cheerleaders

What do Denver cheerleaders have in common with the mascot?

THEY BOTH LOOK LIKE HORSES!

I don’t think I ever seen a more ugly cheerleading squad, it look like a bunch of crackhead rippers in orange and blue, looks like you got your girls from the 99 cent store, them girls need to put masks on there faces, they so ugly, if Austin Powers and Cher was to have daughters they would look like Denver’s cheerleaders.

 

Horse Fans

Fake, Fake, Fake, they wear there hats with Horses on them, go to the games and eat their cheese sandwiches with the crust cut off, they sip on coffee while sitting in INVESCO field, they were there bright orange t shirts looking like they should be working on the side of the road picking up trash off the ground.

They think Denver is better then what they really are, Denver fans aren’t loyal, look how fast they turned on Jay Cutler, Mike Shanahan, and Brandon Marshall.

Denver fans are cry babies

Denver fans get they ass beat when they come to Oakland wearing there white Broncos jerseys.

Denver fans get barbecued Ribs thrown at them.

Denver fans get socked in the mouth for even talking in Oakland.

Denver fans are scared of the Black hole.

Denver fans hate on Oakland because they know we are the better franchise with the better history.

Denver fans know the Raiders have gotten much better this season then they where last season when Oakland beat them, I mean blew them out 31-10 in mile high.

Denver fans know JaMarcus Russell is the truth, and have seen first hand what JaMarcus can do, if not go back to Ashley Lelie week 12. 31-10.

Denver has the worst fans in the AFC WEST, maybe NFL besides Lions.

Denver hasn’t done anything since John Elway was around, the last time John Elway was on a videogame was Sega Genesis 1998.

Denver fans dress up in horse gear,  enough said.

Denver fans scream and rooted for Jay Cutler last season, now they hate him and call him a baby.

Denver fans think Robert Ayers is the next big thing, when really he is the next Jarvis Moss.

Denver fans wear paper bags over there heads.

Denver fans are like ugly girls, only old free agents want to be with them.

Denver fans believe Lamont Jordan and Correll Buckhalter are the answer. Knowshon Moreno is the future face of the franchise, lol.

How many Denver fans does it take to screw a lightbulb?  WAIT A SECOND THERE ARE NO DENVER FANS!! (expect B/R ones)

Denver fans think there team will go 9-7 lol

Denver fans will grow there beard out like Kyle Orton lol

Denver fans think Alphonso Smith is just as good as Antiono Winfield lol

Denver fans will boo 2,489 times by the 6th game  of the season

Denver fans hate Oakland, they say Oakland is full of thugs, drugs, pimps, players, macs, rappers, purple weed, land where they get hyphy, swing there whips, get stupid, act a nut, go dummy, on one, will stomp your car out… and Denver fans are right.

Denver fans are L7

Denver fans look like sayre lol

Denver fans considerd themsleve high class, haha

Denver fans are soft

Denver fans are wack

Denver fans don’t want to see the Black Hole in a fight. They will get stomped.

 

City of Denver

Northern California, smash on the whole state of Colorado, end of subject, ya’ll get all your game from us, we got the most style, best fans, die hard Raider Nation, Sliver and Black, best colors in the NFL, best staduim yeah i said it, I dont care if it old, grimey, and dirty it’s the black hole, you beezy.

Denver aint shit, edgewater weak, Englewood weak, Aurora weak, Glendale weak, Arvada weak, Wheat ridge weak, Lake Wood, Lake Side, Westminster, all of that is wack.

This is California cutty

Yay Area

Town Bizness

Get on BART wearing that Orange Horse shit and get scraped

Come in the parking lot wearing that Orange Horse shit and get scraped

Sit in the black hole in that Orange Horse shit and get scraped.

Orange in a sea of black…

I’ll go straight to Invesco Field, in all Raiders gear from head to toe, with a Raiders hat, a Kirk Morrison jersey, a Raiders starter jacket, Black jeans, Raiders shoes, Raiders flag, waving that shit from left to right ready to who ride on the Horses like we did last season 31-10 week 12.

Horse fans won’t say a word.

2009-2010 Week 3 live and direct from East Oakland California, its super bad for the Denver Horses I promise ya’ll.

Pt. 2 coming soon…

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